Next to COVID, the next talking point is very much people’s mental health. It feels like a subject that people are becoming more and more aware of, which in many ways this is a wonderful thing, it reduces stigma and can no longer be ignored by professionals.
A very different picture to the one I was faced back in the mid-’90s when I seemed to be the only person struggling! Now it seems everyone has one demon or another they are in conflict with. But are aware you of how you’re feeling, or are you busily trying to push these feelings away? If you are aware, do you have insight? Do you know why you feel the way you do and what you can do to help yourself? Or did you seek help and got nowhere?
Generally, more and more people do now seek help for how they’re feeling, but what’s on offer?
The options tend to be treatment in the form of medication, a prescription of self-help in the form of exercise or meaningful activity, or talking therapies, like CBT or counselling that usually have long waiting lists, unless you are able to access private therapy. As much as these approaches are all evidenced to help and can serve a purpose, they do not remove the real issue at play:
The stuff (story, lies and beliefs) that gets in the way of connecting with your True Self.
I realise that when you are faced with very overwhelming emotions and thoughts, it’s only natural to seek the most obvious help available from your GP.
But, from my personal experience of living with severe mental illness for many years, and as a practising counsellor of nearly a decade, I know that in order to free yourself of the inner conflict and struggle that is now labelled as a mental health problem, in order to help yourself, you have to dig deeper and find a way that aligns with you to heal the mind and body and set about changing how you respond to life.
You see from my perspective, a presentation of mental health problems is the surface indicator that you are not being True to yourself. You don’t have to struggle or believe you’re not worthy. You don’t have to think you’re inadequate and compare yourself to others. You don’t have to doubt yourself and seek external validation. None of this is necessary when you are being who you really are, Your True Self.
You see when you are in a state of overwhelm, you’re in a stress state and reacting from a place of fear/trauma: the fight, freeze or flight response, and until you are able to reprogram the mind and heal the trauma that resides within the body you will stay stuck in this pattern that is labelled as a mental health problem.
But, when you go deeper and start to develop a loving relationship with yourself, you being to start trusting yourself, you create the opportunity to discover who you really are. Using kindness, love and compassion to gain the insight and awareness required to understand why you feel and respond in the way that you do, can change and shift your whole experience and no longer feel limited by your mental health struggles.
Here a few ways to start developing a trusting relationship with yourself:
- Start to be mindful, become aware of your patterns and notice when you respond to something that creates distress. Don’t be hard on yourself, or fight this response, simply notice and accept them for now.
- Start to take time each day to be present with your Self: meditation, a walk in nature, mindful breathing.
- Start to journal; no agenda, just simply set aside some time to write and see what comes up for you. This is a very cathartic way to gain understanding and awareness into what’s going on beneath the surface and to receive guidance from your True Self.
- Talk to someone – often just verbalising how you feel can reduce the overwhelm and burden of how you’re feeling and help you to gain another perspective.
- Empower yourself and find a way forward beyond the current ‘stuck state’ you may find yourself in – read an inspiring self-development book, do something that challenges you, or engage in some life-changing therapy that needn’t take forever or cost the earth, such as my 1:1 Self Love Therapy Programme.
The main thing is to shift your current state by doing something different!
Only you are the one that can do this, and it can only happen when you make it happen! But once you start to create these shifts the people that can help facilitate your healing journey will appear and offer help and guidance along your way.